Marriage

I’m married to a really great man. And we have a good marriage. A really good marriage.

Sadly, I think really good marriages are becoming more uncommon. Actually, I think good marriages are common…but people don’t realize when they are already in a good marriage.

Our marriage is very good…but it is not easy. It is very good because it’s not easy.

In the last nine years, we have faced a lot of obstacles. We’re facing some pretty big ones right now. And we have disagreed on how to handle those obstacles – sometimes quite emotionally. And there have been plenty of times where one or both of us wanted to just throw up our hands and say FINE! Whatever YOU want. I don’t care! Just stop talking about it! We wanted to give in and give up, just to end the conflict.

But we didn’t. We don’t. We have always kept talking. Not without sometimes invoking the 10:00 rule (no more difficult discussions after 10:00 p.m., when we’re too tired to be reasonable) or the 24+ hour rule (I really can’t talk about this for awhile until I’ve had a chance to process my thoughts and feelings), but we always keep talking. And because of that, we have a great marriage.

We have sex (sorry parents, but yes, I’m going there…) and because of that, we have a great marriage. And I’m not talking about frequency or quality, because those can vary depending on so many factors. But even when we are stressed, or completely overwhelmed by life, or just generally not in the mood for sex, we don’t forget the need and desire for an intimate relationship. And sometimes that means one of us calling a “moral imperative”: acknowledging that neither of us has a strong desire at that moment to be intimate, but that for the health of our marriage, we are going to choose intimacy anyway. And that makes us stronger together.

And we pray. Which is the biggest reason why I believe our marriage is great. I’m not talking just about praying together, which we do, although not consistently. The prayers that more often shape our marriage are our individual prayers. When an issue seems impossible to overcome, I know that Scott is praying about it. And he knows that I am too. And eventually, God shapes us and changes our hearts so that we continue to grow together. And in growing together, we maintain our great marriage.

Easy/Quick: Summer Veggie Salad

This is a super easy, quick recipe that tastes yummy in the summertime. I especially love it because I can “dump” whatever veggies I have on hand into the salad without worrying about ruining it!

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Summer Veggie Salad

Mandatory Ingredients:
1 small jar marinated artichoke hearts
1 small bottle Italian Salad Dressing

Veggies — choose and mix whatever you like. Following are some of our favorites that I’ll toss in, depending on what I have on hand:
black olives
tomatoes
cucumbers
zucchini
yellow squash
bell peppers
carrots
asparagus
baby corn

Cut veggies and artichoke hearts into bite size pieces. Mix veggies, Italian salad dressing and artichoke hearts, including the juice from the marinade, in a large bowl. Toss to coat veggies. Refrigerate for 2-3 hrs before serving.
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Easy as pie. No wait…much easier!

Friday Jokes

Sadly, I am not a joke teller. I would like to be, but can never seem to remember any…except the banana, banana, orange joke. I have, however, recently read two great jokes, which I’m sharing below with the understanding that once you read them, and laugh, you will leave your favorite joke (clean, please) so that my kids will continue to think I’m super cool when they grow tired of hearing the banana, banana, orange joke!

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By email from Gram:

An elderly woman had just returned to her home from an evening of church services, when she was startled by an intruder. She caught the man in the act of robbing her home of its valuables and yelled: ‘Stop! Acts 2:38!’ (…Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins…)

The burglar stopped in his tracks. The woman calmly called the police and explained what she had done.

As the officer cuffed the man to take him in, he asked the burglar: ‘Why did you just stand there? All the old lady did was yell a scripture to you.’

‘Scripture?’ replied the burglar. ‘She said she had an Ax and Two 38’s!’

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Found on Rachelle Gardner’s blog, here:

A little girl asked her mother, “How did the human race appear?”

The mother answered, “God made Adam and Eve and they had children and then all mankind was made.”

Two days later the girl asked her father the same question.

The father answered, “Many years ago there were apes, which evolved into monkeys, from which the human race evolved.”

The confused girl returned to her mother and said, “Mom, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Dad said they developed from apes?”

The mother answered, “Well, dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family, and your father told you about his.”

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What I’m Dwelling On…

Psalm 9:9-10 ESV

The LORD is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. And those who know your name put their trust in you, for you, O LORD, have not forsaken those who seek you.

Psalm 7:10 ESV

My shield is with God, who saves the upright in heart.

What verse(s) are you dwelling on right now?
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If you would like to join a scripture memory challenge:

Super Suspicious…

The Tooth Fairy has been a fun part of our family over the last few years. It started with Jonah’s first tooth, when she tripped her way into his room and rather clumsily deposited his reward under the pillow. Fortunately, Jonah was too excited about the lost tooth to notice her varied fumbles.

As more and more teeth departed Jonah’s mouth, the Tooth Fairy gained prowess and sophistication to the point that she now (thanks to the wonderfully talented Mr. Tooth Fairy) usually leaves a water-marked certificate under his pillow while depositing the requisite reward.

Of course, Jonah likes to keep her on her toes and often leaves an unexpected special treat for her. Sometimes he likes to hide his tooth, to see if she can find it. Sometimes he chooses to write her a personal note…in the dark…on a corner of a shoe box…with a broken piece of crayon…so as not to disturb Mom & Dad. And then in the morning he checks to see whether she found the tooth and took the note.

As he says, he’s a genius. And he’s not completely sure he believes in the tooth fairy any more. He says he thinks it might be mom and dad.

He’s growing up too fast.

Well, last week, Jonah had oral surgery to remove an extra tooth. And of course, the tooth fairy left an extra special reward and a special certificate for his bravery. He was pretty jazzed. The reward went in his wallet and the certificate went on the refrigerator.

Later that day, Jonah brought me his certificate with two pieces of copy paper from the printer and proceeded to tell me that the tooth fairy’s certificate was the same exact size as the copy paper…and that he thought the paper was too heavy for her to be able to carry anyway, thus proving that the whole thing is really just mom and dad.

I quickly reminded him of Toothie’s super strength and the fact that copy paper is a very common size for paper.

Jonah let it go for now. Probably because he still wants the reward. But he did tell me that he’s “super suspicious”.

I’m Back…

Hi!!!!!!

So, I’m finally back. Yay! And yes, I realize I just barely made it before the end of the month. I’ll be putting up some posts over the next few days, and regularly after that (i.e., at least a couple times a week). So check back soon.

And in the meantime, I’m updating the Kid Quip of the Day and the Interesting Info.

Enjoy!

Almost Back…

I feel like I have been away from my blog for ages. Well…it has been ages! But, I have high hopes of being back in the not-too-distant future. Right now, my sweetie is finishing up his MANT degree (Masters in New Testament) and this is his last week of school work. It’s been a very busy semester, and I just haven’t been able to devote any time to the blog.

However, I miss this blog and have been thinking of lots of bloggy ideas to share, so I am definitely planning to be back — regularly — beginning probably mid to late May.

Laughter…

My grandma had two bathrooms at her house. The blue bathroom and the peach bathroom. I liked the peach bathroom the best because of the things grandma had displayed in there. She had a statue of a monkey sitting in her bathtub. And another monkey, I believe, holding the roll of toilet paper. Grandma liked monkeys. And elephants. And gardenias. She also had pictures with cheery or silly sayings on the walls. Above the bathroom sink, she had a scripture verse, cross-stitched by my mom, quoting Proverbs 17:22: A merry heart doeth good like a medicine. Grandma found a lot of humor in life. Even when cancer was taking over her body.

I sometimes get bogged down with life and forget to find the humor in the everyday. Instead of laughing with my kids, I shush them. Instead of enjoying my husbands playful teasing, I sigh and cast a withering glance.

I need more merriment. More laughter. Giggles. Chuckles. Belly laughs. All of it. My body needs the medicine of a cheerful heart. My home needs it too.

My kids are watching Wipeout as I type this. It’s that game show with contestants trying to make their way through insane obstacle courses. I can hear Jonah’s over-the-top belly laughs…and Abby’s giggle.

My heart feels a little merrier.

What’s made your heart merry today?

I don’t want to do this…

This last week marked the start of my sweetie’s last semester here at seminary. We may stay through a summer session or two, but we are in the home stretch. And I want to give up. Quit. Leave right now. Tonight, preferably.

I never dreamed how much I’d love it here. Never thought I’d open my heart to such wonderful friends. Or that I would open my heart at all. I’m much better at putting up walls. I never thought I would love the community, the activities, everything about this old, cold region or that 2 1/2 years later, I would be able to imagine a permanent life here.

But it happened. This became home. We still get crazy homesick for our families and for the familiarity of the west and the life that we have there. But here, we haven’t just been waiting for the next step. We’ve been growing roots that are here for good. And now that it’s time to think about leaving, I don’t want to…it hurts my heart to think about it. I just want the finality. I want it done. Without ceremony. Without good-byes.

Mandy says I can’t do that. She says if I allow myself to shut down now, to withdraw from the activity and life that has marked the last 2 1/2 years for our little family, that I will be sending a signal that all of this, here, is unimportant. Forgettable. Not worth the time.

I can’t do that. I can’t devalue all of this. It’s too important to me.

So over the next few months, when my instincts say to flee, when my heart aches and I want to crawl into bed until it’s over, I’ll cry out to God and I’ll keep my heart open, even though it hurts.

Her Happy Place…

For Christmas this year, my sweetie and I decided to use some Christmas money we received to enroll the kids in classes at our local YMCA. Gymnastics for Jonah and ballet for Abby.

Jonah has been in gymnastics before, so we knew the routine for that. Not a problem.

Abby, however, took a little more effort. Having never taken ballet myself, we naturally had no clue where to shop for the necessary ballet items. So, we did what any wise parent would do. We headed to walmart, kohls and target. And between the three, we pieced together a cute outfit for her. However, apparently, the ballet slippers we found for her are not actually very practical because they are too slippery for wooden floors. So, after talking with her ballet teacher, we were referred to On Your Toes, a dance store in our area.

Oh. my. gracious. When we entered this store, you should have seen Abby’s whole being light up. This was her store. And it was perfect. She practically floated through the various displays of leotards and pink fluffy skirts and leg warmers and everything else related in any way to dance. And then, a sales associate asked us what we were looking for and when we said shoes, she actually took Abby to the back of the store for a fitting.

Abby sat on the little stool in the back of the store just glowing as our sales associate tried on ballet shoes and adjusted them to find the best fit for Abby. And she asked us grown up, professional questions with all naturalness. “And where does Abby dance?” “How long has Abby been dancing now?” Abby felt so special.

When we left the store, with shoes in hand, Abby exclaimed “I love this place!”

So, I guess when a certain little girl’s birthday comes along, we’ll know exactly where to go. Happy place, happy place, happy place.